The Doctors Are In

Photo: The Howard Stern Show

Howard started today saying he listened to a replay of the show yesterday, and felt he was swearing too much on the air.

This led Artie and Robin to acknowledge they noticed his cursing streak as well, and Howard insisted he was going to put an end to it.

Howard went on to say he lost another game of chess yesterday because he didn’t have much time to play, and that he resorted to lying to Beth on the phone about what he was doing when she called: he told her he was talking to his agent, Don Buchwald, but she “called him out” on the fact that he was really playing chess.

When Howard next wondered what his therapist thought of him given some of his habits, Robin responded she felt the therapist must think he was “a lunatic.” Upon hearing Robin’s explanation, Howard asked her if she thought Beth was happy with him, and Robin said she figured Beth had “a difficult life.”

Robin went on to note she felt badly for everyone from Ronnie the Limo Driver to Howard’s assistant, Laura, because of how much time they had to spend dealing with Howard. Artie mentioned he felt Howard was “too obsessive,” recalling how, even though Howard paid for everyone’s recent trip to Bubba the Love Sponge’s wedding, he still wouldn’t let Artie or Tim Sabean tip the limo driver who took them to airport.

Based on this, Artie added he felt Howard “went crazy” if people didn’t reciprocate the amount of time and energy he put into making other people “happy.” Artie also pointed out that, since Howard wanted everyone to be happy all the time, he felt pressure to be just that, which he acknowledged made him uncomfortable. Artie then commented he also felt Howard got mad at people when they didn’t come up with some of the ideas he did, and Gary readily agreed.

Gary went on to say he used to “almost throw up” before the weekly creative meetings at KROCK out of fear of what Howard would say to him during them. Artie said he thought Howard “cared too much” about his fans, explaining if only one person didn’t enjoy a bit, Howard considered it a failure.

When Howard admitted he had “zero satisfaction” with his career, Gary informed him that terrestrial radio was now promoting HD radio, which he thought was a direct result of Howard’s move to satellite, and therefore the ultimate compliment.

However, Howard replied by saying he didn’t see it the same way, and that he considered it to be nothing more than another battle he had to fight.