Ho Ho Ho, Stop the Clock! Flat Ronnie Has Arrived!

Photo: The Howard Stern Show

The ultimate stocking stuffer has arrived – Flat Ronnie! Until now there was no way to actually get your very own paper limo driver but the wait is over. Using the link below you can easily print out a high-quality and highly-agitated Flat Ronnie.

At this point you might be asking yourself, “What exactly does someone do with a cutout image of the angriest limo driver/security guard/sex expert in the world?” The answer is simple: Everything.

Take your Flat Ronnie with you everywhere you go. Pose him in interesting places, snap a photo and post his adventure to Twitter and Facebook with the hashtag #FlatRonnie. Maybe, just maybe, you’ll get a retweet from the only man who might be older than Saint Nick himself.

Merry Christmas and God bless us, everyone!

Directions:

Step One: Click Here For The Hi-Res Flat Ronnie

Step Two: Right-Click + Save Flat Ronnie To Your Desktop

Step Three: Print Flat Ronnie (Or Have Someone Else Print Flat Ronnie For You)

Step Four (Optional): Attach A Handle To Flat Ronnie (e.g. popsicle stick, broom handle, 2×4)

Step Five: We’ll Leave The Rest Up To You …