Wack Packer Marfan Mike Talks Surviving a Coma and Being Hospitalized for Nearly a Year

Marfan Mike checked in with Howard on Monday for one of the first times since being welcomed into the Wack Pack. According to staffer and resident Wack Pack handler Shuli Egar, Mike’s absence was largely due to health issues. He checked into the hospital with pneumonia-like symptoms in early 2019 and didn’t check back out for nearly a year.

“At one point, they had to put him into a medically induced coma,” Shuli told Howard.

Howard had plenty of questions for Marfan Mike about his health, but first he offered his thoughts about his employee’s new quarantine beard. “Mandy Patinkin has joined the cast of our show … Oh wait a second, that’s Shuli with a big beard,” Howard laughed before singing a “Fiddler on the Roof” song parody.

When Howard did get Marfan on the phone, he asked the Wack Packer what it was like to be in a coma. “Do you have cool dreams? Did you meet God?” Howard wondered.

“No, I was hallucinating. I was so high,” Marfan said, though he did recall one dream in which he’d been kidnapped.

Sharing details about his hospital stay, the Wack Packer revealed he lost the ability to talk for months on end, was forced to relearn how to walk, and even “flatlined” twice. His situation got so bad at one point his own father feared he might die. Mike is on the mend now, thankfully, but things aren’t perfect. He still can’t even use his left hand. He told Howard he still has his job in customer service and lives at home with his mother, which has apparently forced him to quit masturbating completely.

Howard was just grateful Marfan was feeling better. “I’m just happy you’re alive,” he said. “I don’t want to lose another Wack Packer.”

Howard also spent a few minutes Monday morning remembering a few Wack Packers the show lost over the years, like Rappin’ Granny, Crackhead Bob, the original Bigfoot, and of course Eric the Actor. He then mentioned several Wack Packers who had become hard to reach or get on the air, including Beetlejuice, Angry Alice, and Fred the Elephant Boy, who has been part of the Wack Pack since 1988 but recently turned on the Stern Show for political reasons.

“What? Who knew he even had a political stance?” Robin asked.

Elephant Boy was willing to call Howard on Monday and offered well wishes to Marfan Mike before attempting to explain why he claimed to have quit the show. Howard wondered how someone who has been open about his same-sex encounters in the past could support an ideology which doesn’t advocate for gay rights.

“I base my philosophy on facts rather than emotion,” Fred told Howard, though he remained polite.

Executive producer Gary Dell’Abate eventually chimed in and accused Fred of being nicer to Howard on the phone than he had been recently on social media. “I feel like you’re backing down because you’re talking to Howard,” Gary said, adding, “He calls [Howard] the Alex Jones of the left.”

But when pressed on it, Fred the Elephant Boy said he plans to continue supporting the Stern Show. “Only because of my friend Marfan, I am keeping you,” Fred said.